Parenting

Parenting Guilt

The One I Can’t Forgive

May 21, 2018

I've made a lot of mistakes as a parent. I've written about most of them here - they range from tragicomic incidents like accidentally bringing my four-year-old to a verrrrrry adult haunted house and getting my entire family into a The Hills Are Alive situation, to having my head elsewhere when they need it to be right there with them.

Listening. I am so bad at listening.

I've also written over and over about the importance of forgiving yourself. About the fact that we are, all of us, flawed - and yet all of us are, of course, doing the best that we can. We love our children impossibly, and yet we make mistakes - sometimes the same ones, over and over and over. I know that dwelling on these mistakes helps no one. I know that you learn from them; you move on; you try to do better the next time.

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DIARY

Putting It On My Succulent

May 8, 2018

I may need more than one.

Francesca has, as of late, been using the word "manifest" in casual conversation more than I'm reasonably able to handle. (And I have told her as much, e.g. "I love you very much, but if you keep telling me to manifest I will put you on mute.")

Look, I had a meditation coach for awhile. I spent my high school years practicing Wicca, and really wanted to buy a massive, perfectly round crystal I saw in a store the other day. I am, in other words, not completely sans woo elements in my own personality. (And please be aware that I use the term "woo" - as in "woo-woo" - with a big spoonful of affection; I respect and appreciate that people explore their inner selves in various ways that sure, may appear a little odd to others, but that work for them. Yay for spirituality and self-exploration. Yay for crystals and meditation. Just please don't make me manifest.)

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Anxiety

Less Sorry

May 1, 2018

A scar is what happens when the word is made flesh. - Leonard Cohen

I wanted another baby.

It’s strange to be saying that out loud, because for a long time not even my own mother knew that I wanted a third child. A couple of my friends knew, but when we discussed it I never used the word “trying.” I danced around the subject. Oh, you know, we’ll see what happens.

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My Looks

Mommy and Me (And a Fun Little Friendship Origin Story)

April 27, 2018

Dresses from the Stripes Boutique Mommy and Me Shop

I'm not ordinarily a "mommy-and-me" outfit-type person. I mean OK, my daughter and I have matching pom-pom shoes...but come on: when matching pom-pom shoes exist, buying and then wearing them (at the same time) is clearly non-optional.

So when my friend Elise told me she wanted us to model some of the mommy-and-me dresses she'd designed for her label, Stripes, my answer was "...Eh, I don't know."

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Parenting

Lemondrop

April 9, 2018

This girl though. (Dress | Shoes)

The bulk of my daughter's wardrobe consists of her brother's hand-me-downs - because of the money/effort-saving thing, but also because I've always loved how she looks in his old stuff - but of course I do occasionally come across a flouncy, girly dress or pair of shoes that I can't resist. The problem with "special clothing" for kids, though, is that kids have a tendency to ruin it. Immediately. So I did what I suppose most parents do with their children's nicer clothing: I reserved it for special occasions.

Except there was this one dress - a red corduroy dress that my mother-in-law gave her that was meant to be her Christmas dress. But the first Christmas she had it, it was too big for her, so I figured I'd save it for the next Christmas and not have her wear it in the meantime so it still felt special...and then the next Christmas it was too small. So now it's in a box in our garage. After that, I began applying the same principle to my kids' clothing as I do to my own: the only way you can be absolutely certain that you won’t mess it something up is to never wear it...and what that means is that it’ll never get worn.

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